A recent study in Quebec showed up to 30 per cent of children are neglected.
While some may question the findings of the study, it’s notable in several ways.
Many children are afraid to be left alone. While you can distract them for a little while by playing a movie, soon they want mommy or daddy.
Children who don’t feel secure, turn into adults with issues.
Our society needs to realize that children deserve our unconditional love and support. They need to feel safe and secure. They need to have their needs met.
When they aren’t loved unconditionally, the world becomes a scary place for them and that can lead to all kinds of problems for the child that linger well into adulthood and may never go away.
The reason I mention this study is because being neglectful can be just as traumatic to a child as yelling at them or abusing them emotionally or physically.
While at a soccer tournament recently, I was in a car parked beside a man and his son. The son had on a white uniform and he spilled something on it.
The father’s reaction was absolutely appalling. He called his son a putz several times. “Why do you have to be such a putz?” He let the F-bomb fly over and over as he tried to clean the uniform. He asked the boy what was wrong with him. The child looked down to the ground and placed his head against the back of the front car seat as he sat in the back.
I rolled down my window to let the father know that his cursing and name calling could be heard.
The mother then walked over and was herself astounded by her husband’s reaction.
It’s a white uniform, she told him, and it was adults who gave him the food. What do you expect?
At that point, I offered my Clorox wipes to see if they could get the uniform clean. I told them that my son’s uniform was also white and getting stains out was a constant.
The father settled down and the mother was embarrassed and asked me if I had heard “the domestic.”
The child looked at me with a smile and said thank you.
We cannot treat our children this way. Children are going to spill things. They are going to cry. They will throw temper tantrums but we are adults. We can deal with this. We need to tell our children that we love them and treasure them.
It’s the first step to solving some of the problems that plague our world.